Tales from the Parking Lot
by misskaterinab
Summary: Written for a Glee Kink Meme prompt. Kurt gets a little intense during his Black Friday shopping. Blaine needs to get Kurt to relax before something happens. Sexy shenanigans ensue in the Navigator.


A/N: Written for a Glee Kink Meme prompt. Link is here glee-kink-meme dot livejournal dot com / 38839 dot html?thread=51965623& or you can just scroll down to the end and read it there. OP: This isn't quite exactly as prompted, but I hope you like it anyway.

**xXxXxXx**

Blaine dragged his seething boyfriend out of the crowded store and into a blessedly empty corner of the mall. He attempted to mask his frustration and adopted what he hoped was a soothing tone in his voice. "Okay, honey, you need to calm down."

"I do not!" Kurt said indignantly.

"Kurt, you just said you'd 'cut a bitch' for taking the last cashmere scarf!"

"She took it right out of my HANDS, Blaine! She should be punished! If not for taking it, then definitely for thinking that it wouldn't look absolutely hideous with her skin tone. It would've looked incredible with mine," he said longingly.

"It probably wasn't even for her. This is Black Friday, Kurt. People _do_ tend to Christmas shop on Black Friday."

"I don't care. She _stole_ it from me and she shouldn't have been allowed to get away with it. I can't _believe_ that manager sided with her," Kurt said dramatically as he slumped against the wall outside of the store.

"He sided with her because she managed to put her claws away and look like the innocent party before he came out to separate you two."

"If I ever see that woman again I'm gonna give her a piece of – "

"ENOUGH." Blaine sighed. He shifted his burden to one arm and reached down to grab Kurt's hand with the other, pulling him to a standing position again. "Come on. You need to chill out and I need to put these bags down. You must have fifty pounds of stuff here. My arms are falling off."

"Amateur," Kurt said, smirking.

"I mean it. Let's take a break – we'll drag your stuff out to the car, take a few moments to breathe, and then come back inside and finish up."

"I can't afford to take a break, Blaine. I still have bargains to purchase! My wardrobe depends on it!"

"You also can't afford to have to have your father bail you out of jail for accosting shoppers throughout the mall."

"Point taken," Kurt conceded. "Let's hurry, though. Macy's has those jeans you like to peel off me on doorbuster today, so if you don't want me to miss out on them, we'll have to do this quickly."

Blaine stopped in his tracks for a moment. God did he love those jeans. But he shook the thought out of his mind and continued leading the way to the car. He had to get Kurt out of this mall before something bad happened. And so that something GOOD could happen…

**xXxXxXx**

They dodged their way through the hordes of shoppers toward the doors, and then they slogged their way through the parking lot to Kurt's SUV. The previous night's snowfall had turned to slush with the rising temperature and increased traffic through the parking lot and was no longer as pretty as it had been when it was freshly fallen. Kurt whined the whole way about the state of his boots, even though they were treated to be water resistant and made for walking through the rain and snow, but Blaine ignored him. They reached the Navigator and Kurt opened the rear gate so Blaine could unload Kurt's purchases from his arms ("Careful, Blaine! That one has glass in it!"). After shaking his arms out for a moment to get the blood pumping through them again, he grabbed Kurt's sheepskin-gloved hand and dragged him to the rear passenger door.

"Get in," he ordered.

"What? Blaine, I thought we were just coming out here to drop off bags," Kurt said, confused.

"You, my dear, need to be nowhere near that mall right now. You need to relax, and I'm going to make sure you do. Get. In," Blaine growled, but not in a way that scared Kurt. It was almost kind of… sexy.

Without another word, Kurt obeyed Blaine's command. He slid across the bench seat and sat, Blaine following directly behind him.

"Keys?" Blaine requested. Kurt handed them to him and Blaine leaned over into the front seat, putting the keys into the ignition and turning the engine over. He adjusted the fan so that the heat would flow into the back seat. He sat back down and turned to face Kurt. Kurt stared at Blaine expectantly, but Blaine remained silent. Finally, Blaine spoke up.

"Drop your pants."

Kurt's jaw dropped. He wasn't sure he had heard Blaine correctly.

"Ex_cuse_ me?"

"You heard me just fine. Pants down. Now."

Kurt felt his breathing quicken. He never enjoyed anyone telling him what to do – he was very much his own man and rarely took orders from anyone, thank you very much – but something about the deep, commanding tone Blaine's voice had taken on was… guh. The tightening of his pants was fast becoming painful, and suddenly, he was anxious to obey Blaine.

Kurt stripped off his gloves and coat, and then his hands went to his belt and he began to make quick work of the buckle, his hands shaking slightly from the anticipation. The pants were a little tougher as he was wearing his usual skintight trousers (though damn did they ever make his ass look _amazing_), but even those came down quickly.

"Underwear, too, babe," Blaine said as he watched Kurt with his undivided attention.

"But the seats are leather…"

"We've been sitting on them long enough that they're no longer ice cold. And you won't be sitting on them directly for much longer, so you won't have to worry about sticking," Blaine assured him.

"But – "

"_Now_, Kurt."

Kurt immediately lifted his behind off the seat and peeled his boxer briefs down past his knees. He plopped back down on the seat, his full erection free and bobbing with every movement.

"Bend over the front seat."

Kurt looked at Blaine questioningly, but Blaine smiled, the look on his face reassuring. Nodding, Kurt stood up as best he could in the vehicle and bent over the center console between the seats, bracing himself by placing his hands on the headrests. His legs began to tremble; Kurt wasn't sure if it was due to the slight chill still in the air or the unexpected amount of arousal he was feeling from being told what to do.

His hard cock twitched in reaction to the familiar "click" sound of a lube bottle; he couldn't help but groan softly when he heard it.

"Patience, young grasshopper," Blaine said amusedly. Moments later, he felt a shockingly cold sensation at his entrance and he jumped, nearly smacking his head on the roof of the car.

"Holy _FUCK_, Blaine!" he yelped. "If you wanted me to relax, cold lube isn't going to help your cause any!"

"Sorry, baby," Blaine said, leaning over Kurt's shoulder and kissing him wetly on the cheek. "I thought I warmed it up enough."

"You thought wrong."

"Is this better?" Blaine's fingers again slid between his rear cheeks and traced over his hole.

"_Uhmufkngd_," Kurt moaned, his body melting against the seats in front of him. Blaine chuckled, which cause his hand, and thus his fingers, to jiggle, which in turn stimulated Kurt further.

"I take that as a yes?"

"You're a fucking tease, Anderson. For the love of all that is Gucci, get ON with it!"

Kurt's last word was squeaked out as Blaine finally did what Kurt was asking for. Blaine made short work of prepping Kurt – they were in a busy parking lot on Black Friday and thus on borrowed time. He wanted to make sure Kurt received the full benefits of his relaxation technique before they were discovered.

Blaine moved up to three fingers quickly and leaned over to whisper in Kurt's ear. "You ready for me, baby?"

Kurt pressed backwards, causing Blaine's fingers to enter him further. "God, Blaine, your _fingers…_"

Blaine grinned. "Unless you _want_ to be caught…"

"SHIT," Kurt called out when Blaine's fingers rubbed his prostate as he removed them from Kurt's hole. Breathlessly, he said, "Um yeah, it's not the exhibitionism I'm concerned about, it's the public indecency charges. I don't want there to be any scandals about me before I'm even famous enough for people to care."

Blaine laughed. That was _definitely_ his Kurt.

"Okay, babe, sit."

Kurt flopped down into the seat next to Blaine, but Blaine stopped him.

"No, Kurt," he said, gesturing to his lap. "_SIT._"

Since Kurt had been facing away from him, he hadn't noticed that Blaine had already opened his own pants and made himself ready for Kurt. It was obvious to Kurt how excited their semi-public escapades had made Blaine; he could practically see the blood pulsing through Blaine's erection.

"_Oh GOD_, yes!" Kurt moaned. He stood up carefully, swinging one leg to the other side of Blaine's right leg, and faced away from him, again grabbing the seat backs for support. Slowly he lowered himself into Blaine's lap. He paused briefly when he felt the head of Blaine's cock probing gently at his entrance, and then with a deep breath, he sank down on Blaine in one fluid motion.

"FUCK!" they both yelled, far too loudly for their surroundings. Anyone walking by the vehicle would've been able to hear their cries, but at that point, they had completely forgotten where they were, or why they were there, or anything other than the sensations they were feeling right at that moment.

"_Kurt_," Blaine moaned as he grasped Kurt's hips and tried to move him in his lap.

"Wait, just one more minute," Kurt begged.

"God, baby, you feel so good around me. This is not going to last long," Blaine said breathily. Blaine stilled his own body, waiting for the signal from Kurt, but it wasn't easy. It always felt incredible being inside Kurt, but that day, everything was amplified. Every nerve ending in Blaine's body was screaming with pleasure.

Finally, _finally,_ Kurt gave Blaine permission to continue, and Blaine eagerly grabbed Kurt's hips again, working Kurt up and down his hard cock while Kurt braced himself against the seats in front of him. They kept a steady rhythm; Blaine couldn't help but wonder what Kurt's vehicle looked like on the outside, whether or not people passing them by could tell what the occupants were up to. Briefly, Blaine prayed that the Navigator's shocks were good and then returned his undivided attention to the boy in his lap whose ass was making his entire body feel _amazing._

Kurt himself wasn't sure that sex had ever been this good physically before. Sure, they had had some life-changing emotional sex, but none of the times that they had just been out for a quick fuck had ever felt this damn incredible. Kurt wasn't even ready to come, and yet he knew that when he did, he'd probably see God. Or Heaven. Or all that shit that everybody claims they see when they have the most powerful orgasm of their lives.

As it was, he barely knew his own name. At that moment in time, he only knew two things. He knew Blaine's name, because it was coming out of his mouth in a steady stream, and he knew that he needed to shift just _that much more_ so Blaine's cock would hit that "magic" place inside him and send him hurtling into the climax he was becoming increasingly desperate to achieve.

Kurt ground his ass down on Blaine's next stroke and _ugh, fuck_, FINALLY Blaine's dick rubbed against his prostate, and he let out a loud shriek because of it. As tough as it was, Kurt stayed in the same position so that Blaine could hit it over and over again.

"You like that, huh, baby?" Blaine panted out. His breath was so ragged, Kurt could hardly hear his words, but he figured his point was made: that spot, _right there_…

Blaine thrust back inside and hit that spot again. And again. And again.

Kurt felt the coil inside his belly tighten and he knew that this was going to be "the big one." The feeling was rising quickly; if he had been jogging to the top of the mountain before, he was definitely sprinting at world record speed now.

"I – ungh – Blaine – "

"You better be telling me you're gonna come, Kurt, 'cause I'm not going to be able to wait for you," he grunted. His thrusts became erratic, and he felt himself ready to explode. Thankfully for him, one of his final jabs to Kurt's prostate sent Kurt crashing over the edge into his climax.

Kurt yelped out Blaine's name as his vision went white. He very nearly passed out due to pleasure overload, but the sensation of Blaine throbbing inside him kept him on this side of consciousness. When Blaine succumbed to his own orgasm, he slammed himself as deeply as possible into Kurt, a stream of colorful expletives escaping from his mouth.

Gasping loudly and feeling like his entire body was made of limp spaghetti, Kurt collapsed forward over the console, narrowly managing to keep himself out of the mess he had made in front of him. _Remind me to care about that later,_ he thought to himself.

The Navigator's occupants were silent aside from the sounds of them desperately trying to recapture their breath.

"That was…" Kurt said.

"Yeah," Blaine agreed.

They remained in their current positions for a few more moments recovering and basking in the afterglow before their bodies reminding them that stretching their limbs and cleaning up before things dried and got too uncomfortable would be best.

Kurt heard the crinkle of a plastic package behind him. "Blaine Anderson, if you're even THINKING of using one of the baby wipes from the package I keep back there on me, you have another think coming 'cause those things are probably colder than Sue Sylvester's heart."

"I can warm them up!" Blaine insisted.

"If you warm up the baby wipes like you warm up lube, I think I'll pass." Kurt reached out and grabbed the box of tissues from the front seat and handed them back to Blaine.

Kurt felt Blaine gently clean him with the tissues, and when Blaine was done, Kurt flopped back into the seat behind him as Blaine took care of himself. Kurt caught Blaine's eye and smiled softly. Blaine couldn't help but grin at him goofily in return.

"Let's just go home. I feel way too good right now to even think about battling the angry mob. Besides, I wouldn't mind a repeat," Kurt said, winking at Blaine exaggeratedly.

"No," Blaine said firmly.

"No?"

"No. We're going back in."

"But whyyyyyyy?" Kurt whined. "I feel soooo good. So relaxed. And you're the one who wanted me to relax."

"If we don't go back in and get those jeans, then what am I going to peel off you later tonight?"

"Oh!" Kurt exclaimed. He hurriedly yanked his underwear and pants back up over his hips, and his fingers fumbled on the buttons in his haste. "You're right! And I know of a _FABULOUS _top that you're going to just LOVE to strip me out of, too!"

Kurt flung open the door, grabbed his coat, and jumped out of the vehicle. He didn't even wait for Blaine before taking off through the parking lot back toward the mall. Quickly, Blaine set his own clothing to rights and trotted off after him, chuckling and shaking his head the whole way.

**xxxxxxxx**

_Original prompt:_

_I just need a Black Friday fic with Klaine._

_Kurt is out shopping with Blaine and he's really intense about it. He wants those 50% shoes and scarves damn it. So he's going crazy and really wound up, running around from place to place getting more stressed as he goes along. Blaine thinks Kurt needs to relax. So when they finish up at one store he drags Kurt back to his car and they have sex right there in the back seat._

_I want Kurt on his knees on the seat, holding the door and window (so sitting up kinda) and his pants are only pushed down enough for Blaine to get to his ass. And Blaine's behind him with only his dick out of his zipper. They have quick semi-rough sex and after Kurt is all loose and pliant so when they get to the next store he's more relaxed._


End file.
